What comes to mind when you think of the word vulnerable? For me, I think about being fully open to someone or something, and that in itself is a scary thing. Honestly, this is the time we discuss why being vulnerable is not a horrible thing in the end. Notice I said “in the end”, because in the beginning, it takes a lot of courage to even take that step in letting that void be filled or letting the filled void be seen. Did you understand that? Let me repeat, “It takes COURAGE to take that step in letting that void be filled or letting the FILLED VOID BE SEEN”.
That is an uneasy task. Once that is done, you are no longer who you were before because of your life changes. How your life changes is up to you and how much you allow. Some people pick and choose how much they want people to see with the expectancy that the next person would show them all of who they are. How can you expect so much from someone else, when you do not trust yourself enough to let your walls down?
Vulnerability in relationships.
I know that being vulnerable within relationships can be tough. I know it can take a lot to let your guard down and have so much of who you are revealed, but when you have a new mindset and understand it could be a good thing…it actually can. Some of you are probably baffled right now at the statement I just made but read a little more, you’ll understand.
To be vulnerable in real life means that you are basically setting yourself up for possible means of having a broken heart, heartache, headaches, rejection, disappointments, embarrassment, failure, pain, hurt and a whole bunch of other negativity that “supposedly” comes with it.
Why should you put yourself through that? Why should you allow someone access to your safe place when you can just protect yourself?
1. Vulnerability makes you stronger.
In situations where you have to express yourself and say how you feel, even when you don’t want to.
In situations where you might have to ask for what you want, although you might be a person who does not like to ask for things (like me).
In situations where you have to talk stuff out period; that includes uncomfortable conversations that are unavoidable.
YES, I have been there. There is strength in the people that actually go for it and get it done.
2. It can make you happier.
So many times we hide our feelings and act like we are okay without love…news flash that’s a lie. We were made to love and to have love shown back to us. That’s a part of being a human being. Also, God created love and HE IS LOVE. So stop lying to yourself. Being vulnerable allows us to quit hiding behind the facade and to just take a chance. Depending solely on alcohol to “get you turnt up or lit” so that you can barricade your awkwardness or shyness won’t always hide your fears. It just covers it up. How exhausting is that to keep hiding behind WHO YOU TRULY ARE because of f e a r ? That is not good for your mental health. When you numb your feelings of fear or embarrassment, you also numb the feelings of happiness and hope.
3. It allows you to know yourself a bit more.
You have to touch base with yourself and acknowledge what and how you feel. I know life is not surrounded by feelings because feelings change, but get a grip on it. reality check if you have to.
Vulnerability in life (period). I have come to the understanding that life is unpredictable and you have to be okay with collecting blows, falling down and getting back up again. Nobody has been handed a silver platter with a serving of success (well maybe privileged folks, royals…I’ll stop there) on it. To make it you have to want to. Vulnerability in life opens doors of opportunity. A perfect example was me starting Keeping Up With MJ last year or becoming a Glossier REP this year. I would have never been able to do this without having my vulnerable side exposed to being critiqued, accepted, rejected or praised.
In life when we are vulnerable we get more connected with other people, thus forming more meaningful relationships/friendships that are authentic and true.
We have to reclaim the word vulnerable. The harsh meaning behind it does not suffice. We have to embrace vulnerability in ourselves for the rewards are so much greater.